Parents want to convince me i am not gay
How do I convince
But just create a road map of sorts that outlines where you want to go in life—with family by your side or not. Now, your back-up plan need not be going through an extensive immigration process and starting life from scratch in a new place. I remember using this episode of popular Indian TV show Satyameva Jayate on accepting alternative sexualities, as an excuse to tease the conversation.
Coming out to homophobic parents can be emotionally challenging and risky. To that, I have a simple solution: Get a bank account. I had to leave my college mid-way, so I had no qualification, no degree, no professional skill set. I first came out to my family back in and after a few intense debates, they made an effort to understand my life.
Learn to prepare, protect your well-being, and navigate the conversation. Coming out is never easy. I have two older sisters, and they got everything right in my parents’ books: from marrying men of the same caste as my family’s to bearing children—a girl and a boy each.
They even threw me a housewarming party when I found a little place to live in, and came over with everything I would need to make it a home. Help them see how happy and healthy you are, and get them educational resources to know what being queer entails.
I had been planning my exit from the family for years, and after thinking about it for over six years, it was my mother who decided that I should leave. Archived post. And sometimes, just stepping out of the home can be enough. Paying for everything by yourself, on the other hand, will awaken the math and budgeting genius in you that you never knew existed.
Along with this, there are many other factors to keep in mind when deciding how to come out to homophobic parents. Understanding and embracing who you are is an incredibly fulfilling but difficult journey, especially if your family isn’t accepting of the LGBTQ community.
It may not be easy for them even if they are supportive. The obvious solution to this is to get a girlfriend and introduce my mom to her, but I'm also not attractive enough to date anybody, so without doing that, how do I convince my mom that I'm not gay so she'll stop asking me?
But, coming out to homophobic parents can be terrifying, and in some instances, even unsafe. You can do that by bringing LGBT-related topics into discussions—be it celebrity marriages or queer politics or issues that queer people face. But when I finally fell in love with someone I found fit enough to bring home for dinner, all hell broke loose.
You also feel less lonely when your head is in the game. When deciding whether to come out to homophobic parents, consider first how they have they reacted towards or about other queer or LGBTQ+ people. But deep down, I always knew this would come to pass.
I immediately contacted my friends because they were my support system. I was the rainbow sheep of my family. But me?. In many ways, it worked out because I can now settle in my own little queer paradise with my partner. All three of my friends with whom I spoke for this piece have been working their butts off to make sure they survive.
But me? Get to earning on the side whatever little you can, and add it to the account for a rainy day when the rainbow is out. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. But still, living with internalised homophobia and rejection at your doorstep often means having to make difficult choices.
So, if you are considering getting out as well, let me and a few of my queer friends help you prepare for the inevitable: surviving on your own. I was always aware that I would never be able to live up to the ideals my family had set for me.
The most important thing is that you focus on your own mental and emotional wellbeing, so you can live your truth. Sometimes, moving cities to get away from people you love but who just cannot accept your sexuality, might be a good idea.
Getting out and finding couches to crash on is not the tough part. She has known her partner for almost 20 years and before moving to NYC where they do not have to keep their love under wraps, they tried living together in Mumbai.
There’s no easy way to deal with homophobic parents or guardians, no matter where you are in your personal journey.